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One of the girls that works in the women’s shoe store had an all out fight with her boyfriend and as I came to help sort things out I got a heel to the face!!! Guess her boyfriend was use to her throwing shoes cause the bastard dodged everyone of them!!! I on the other hand was not so fortunate!

The closest thing I get to a vacation is hiding in the tents at the sporting goods store and taking a nap when they put them up for display!

They started giving segways out to some of the officers in the mall and I secretly hate the stupid things. Well just my luck or maybe some sort of weird karma my best friend ran over my foot breaking my toe and then slammed the segway into the wall literally busting his ass, he broke his tailbone! Now I have to work double shift with a broken toe.

I felt just like the cop from superbad, the part where the kid ran away and he couldn’t catch him, as I chased a skinny as hell teenager out of the mall! But unlike the cop from superbad my friends have a security tape of the kid out running me and me practically dying, which they love to play over and over for me!

I work security at a mall where the public bathroom is a known meeting place for homosexuals. We use to go in on a regular basis and pull them out with local police. On one particular day we went in and caught two men in the act, but to my surprise one of them was my uncle! I still can’t look at him or his wife :(